“The longer a man waits for the cookie, the more he values a woman after he gets it.” Guys, true or false?

Question

Ladies, what do you think?

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

When it comes to women, NOTHING ELSE MATTERS if he doesn't have feelings for you from the start. Men will generally know from either their first significant interaction with you OR from observing you interacting with other people for a while, if he has feelings for you. To use a garden metaphor, think of this as the seed. If there is no seed, there is nothing to grow, and you can give all the water and sun you want, but if there is no seed, you are watering barren ground, and nothing will ever grow. The man MUST have feelings for the girl (not just lust/sexual attraction, but an EMOTIONAL/ROMANTIC connection) or nothing else makes any difference at all. Women VERY COMMONLY confuse sexual attraction from a man with romantic attraction, but that's like comparing a ball gown to a slutty cocktail dress - they may both be dresses, but they otherwise could not be more different.

THEN, the girl has to pass his vetting - which not all guys do well, and some not at all, but most smart guys do pretty thoroughly. Many women he initially has feelings for will quickly be demoted to either "only good for casual sex" or even to "don't want anything to do with at all." To use a personal example, I might meet a girl, and I find her really attractive initially, but if she smokes, drinks regularly, or uses drugs, I immediately lose all interest in her. Those are all hard boundaries for me. Different guys will have different boundaries, but lots of girls who might have potentially been romantically attractive to a man will be disqualified fairly quickly.

FINALLY, he's going to be vetting her for chastity (and, remember, these are ONLY the men who want a serious relationship - TONS of men don't, and so they won't care about the woman's chastity, because they're only going to bang her for a while and then move on). And what he's going to be looking for is a very low body count (relative to her age) and that she has some reasonable level of boundaries for having sex with a new guy. Depending on her age and experience, this could be anywhere between a couple of weeks to a couple of months. The point is to prove that she doesn't just jump into bed with guys, and that she can hold off even if she really wants to jump into bed, and even if HE really wants to jump into bed.

It's not about waiting for a LONG time, per se, it's about having VERY EXCLUSIVE access to that cookie. It's the exclusivity that makes it valuable.

If a girl has slept with 20 or 30 or 50 or 100 guys, then it's not valuable no matter how long you wait for it - way too many people have already sampled it that it's no longer rare. THAT is the key point to understand.

Tim2nice · Accepted Answer

Not for me. I don’t wait. I lose interest and desire if I have to wait

PeachyPie93 · Accepted Answer

I don't think it is the wait that matters as much as it is them spending quality time and getting to know you. If they can't be bothered to know you before they get in your pants they won't be bothered with you regardless. So might as well not give them anything.

AnnaKlugg · Accepted Answer

I don’t think so. A man will either value you or he won’t. If he doesn’t, he’s not worth my time. So I have sex with a man when I want to. Why should I hold off my desires for some notion of making him value me. He should value me for who I am

Apple1996 · Answer

Yes most of the time that is true

Billlewis · Answer

In my case, 'longer'ended up being forever... lol

Dinklex3 · Answer

Nah. I slept with my boyfriend pretty quickly and we got super close & became best friends.

NathanDavis · Answer

douchebags would still dump as soon as they collect the cookie...

TheSpectre · Answer

For me it's true.  I am still waiting for The One cookie.  Promising it to nibble on ONLY THAT cookie forever.

AviatorTom · Answer

No. If he has to wait for the cookie, he'll likely lose interest.

Agape93 · Answer

Nope.

Dargil · Answer

But if we wait too long, the cookie gets stale.

RavVid · Answer

I think it is true. Nobody values what is cheap and easy.

oldguystillhasit · Answer

True

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

No clue but now I want chocolate chip cookies

TaureanBull81 · Answer

Some men will wait for the coochie and there are others who will lose interest if you make him wait too long.

Grond21 · Answer

True as long as she has very good reasons that are morally, ethically, and personally consistent. If it's a standard that he can get behind and that he appreciates in her, it's true. But if it's on a whim or capriciously? Then it's not true

Jennz6 · Answer

I don’t think so

AlexEfron · Answer

Cookie monster stole my cookies

Nifrayu · Answer

False.

Awesomesauce2005 · Answer

The most untrue statement I have ever heard. Withholding feelings for a man is just an all around BAD idea.

Lottydotty · Answer

Im the cookie monster

jahaims · Answer

Opinions aren't true or false. Facts and fallacies are. Some guys will wait 6 months and ghost after they hit it. If a guy wants it bad enough he will lie and strong someone along