Relationships generally don't survive threesomes. Chances are he is bored and he wants to "spice things up". The problem is that fantasy is fantasy for a reason, because it doesn't work that way in real life, if you do this it will almost certainly end the relationship (and most guys do not want to be in a relationship with a woman who has been doing that sort of thing, so it could affect you if the relationship falls apart (which it would more then likely do). Tell him no. Let him know that it made you phyisically ill to even hear him suggest it (I understand the feeling), ask him these questions, that way he knows what is going through your head when he said it. People get stupid ideas in their heads when things start plateauing in the relationship. Women claim they "fell out of love" with the guy, which is of course bull nothing has changed so its clearly not that, and guys start wanting to "spice up" their sex lives. The fact is we are convinced that something has to be happening at all times, we don't look at our relationships as relationships but as entertainment and if its not entertaining us then we start getting stupid ideas (like threesomes). So I don't think its an issue of not caring about you, I think its boredom, and again that's not really what a relationship is for, its for intimacy love and connection not entertainment. It might help to go out and do something different, but I think what you really need to do is talk about this. Either way a threesome is a bad idea.
You are overthinking it. Most guys want to do threesome, just cus 2 girls is better than one. But he asked you to see if you are okay with it. Which took a lot of balls to ask by the way. Threesomes are a great way to experiment and can be awesome if Everyone enjoys it. Keep an open mind. But if you dont want to do it, then dont force yourself cus you won't like it then. And if he doesn't respect your wish or opinion/ cheats on you then congratulations on your break up. Cus if that ends up being the case then he would do so later anyways and you will have saved yourself a lot of time.
Id watch some threesome videos if i were you, think about it for å while, and if you aren't totally against it then say you want to try it, but also let him know that you might change your mind and that he doesn't get to be mad if you do.
Dont be in a relationship where you can't respect eachother
If the random girl can only touch the girlfriend while the boyfriend can only touch the girlfriend and the girlfriend can touch both, is that even considered a threesome?
Ask him if he is okay with that. Talking together is what solves problems and finds solutions
The most difficult part about a threesome is finding someone you are both comfortable with and who is comfortable with you two
I don’t think it means he doesn’t love you.. some people just have fantasies they’d like to do in real life. My husband and I when we first met we talked about having one.. but as time went on and we got into a deeper love, he changed his mind because he didn’t want to be sexual with another girl. It’s very common for a man to want a 3 some. I don’t think he’d cheat if you said no.. try thinking of some things you can do instead to spice things up and get him excited, make him forget that idea and give him something better!
Can you give me some ideas that are better than his threesome fantasy?
Roleplay. Think of a scene in a book you liked. Romance, adventure, good plot, etc. I had a girl once ask me to be a pirate who'd kidnapped and was bent or ravishing her. It was a blast!
Well it depends on the specifics of your own relationship! What he’s never done or has done... those things only you know! Like for example if you’re not comfortable with a 3 some but will do anal, and he’s never had anal then do that! Things like that.
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!Ultimate male sexual fantasy, the paramount of pleasure. It's a thing because we enjoy it. Don't you want your man to feel good? It's exciting for us, and it's primal, you will never get rid of it, we were meant to have multiple women, it's nature.
It doesn't mean he doesn't love you or that he is not excited by you. It also doesn't means he's going to cheat on you. Everyone has his/her own sexual fantasy.
If you don't want to do it, then don't do it.
I am wondering if one of his friends bragged about having a threesome and now he wants to not feel left out. Many guys and women want to experiment, especially when they are young, just to say they tried it.
It isn't necessarily healthy to push the issue with you and if he truly cared about you and put you first, he wouldn't obsess over it. It isn't so bad if he expresses his desire to try it out, but to continue to bring it up even after you told him how you feel about it? That is not being very respectful.
From what I have heard, threesomes are a mixed bag anyway. You can't focus on one partner, one person may feel left out, and if you aren't bi, then it can make the woman feel strange in an FFM. I am assuming he means FFM when he suggests this because most men aren't interested in an MMF...
This reply is really quite good, my question here would be: Is he 'begging' for it, or simply mentioned it?
Every guy on the planet either has, or will have, that fantasy. Many will not get the opportunity to see it through. Some who do see it through will have it happen as a one time thing with people they aren't in a relationship with. If he has the capability to share his fantasy with you, and you're simply not ready or willing to indulge that fantasy and he is understanding then that's okay. Leave the door open, don't tell him it's never going to happen, just that you're not comfortable with it 'now.'
If you ever do decide to try it, if your in a committed relationship I can't stress how important it is that you're communication with each other is paramount. If you don't have that, then you're not ready to go there.
On the other hand, if he's begging you or giving you ultimatums then you're being used and he's not really there for you first and you have to decide what to do about that independently.
He’s not begging but he just wants to try it with me if he gets the chance. And we are in a committed relationship
This was by far the best advice 👍🏻
I think that if he loved you, he would not want to share you or himself with anyone else.
OlderAndWiser-We're good friends, But I must respectfully disagree with your view on this.
@Marinepilot It's okay to disagree.
Yes. PPKA
Uhm... it doesn't mean he doesn't love you. Damn I would like a threesome but I love my girlfriend more than anything in the world! And i would never cheat on her.
Fantasy or not, if he likes threesome so much he shouldn't have committed to you in the first place. Asking you for a threesome is a statement that goes like "i'd like to fuck somebody else but I don't want to break up with you". Selfishness if you ask me. Try to talk him through and if he still sees it that way, you got your answers already.
I think your relationship is screwed. a threesome is a legal way to cheat, if he's looking for MFF sex. If he wants MMF, then it's weird fetish that he's got.
I've talked to my girlfriend about it before. I brought it up as, "What's your opinion on threesomes?" "Would you try it with another guy or another girl?" It probably helps that she is bisexual and we often whisper to each other how attractive a girl is... but really I believe it's how you approach the topic. You need to make sure your partner is open to trying new things or even just capable of talking about topics like that in general. I suggest telling him you aren't sure about it and you need him to understand where you're coming from (example, tell him you're worried about infidelity).
He watches a lot of porn stuff, simple lol😁
threesome can be just whats needed for some whilst others like you dont like it. you need to talk to him and see if you can find middle ground such as roleplay fantasising you just got home from fucking another guy or watching porn together.
I has multiple partners at the same time. Groups of 3 or more and yes they can be a real blast and a ton of fun. But only if you have the mindset for it.
3 somes are not for everyone. So if your not even comforabable. Do not do it.
It also does not mean that he wants to cheat. He just might be one of them with that special mindset.
By the sounds of it. You don't have that mindset. Which can lead to jealously, anger, fights and loss of trust.
The best I can give you. Is don't do it. I don't think you have what it takes for a multiple sex partners.
It’s definitely not for me because it will turn into a bloodbath any second.
means he's interested in other women and satisfied with you at the same time, this is why he wants to try new things with you cause he thinks you're the best choice (can be only choice), but can't be sure about him having feelings for you, but even though if he have then he's not sure or is lying about it, and no your relationship won't survive cause since you're already not ok with this one then you will definitely not be with all other things he'll ask you in future !
Your boyfriend wants to achieve his ultimate fantasy with you but at the same time though that is still cheating even if you both agree to do it with inviting someone else into your bedroom. My advice to you is to keep your options open because even if he loves you that is still taboo in many ways because you didn't get into a open relationship.
Guys are visual. There doesn't really mean there is interest in another actual person even in the fantasy. But it is just a fantasy. If it bothers you, don't do it. But I think most men fantasize about a threesome, doesn't mean anything.
You're right, he's wrong. Consider he's likely a porn addict.
3-some's never turn out like you would like or hope they would, someone always gets their feelings hurt, and it's highly likely the original relationship will implode as well.
Huge red flag here toots.
It only means he liked to have a threesome, not necessarily anything else.
The most likely explanation is that he's just curious.
Been there, done that. Everyone had a delightful time. My wife and I indulged ourselves in other partners, both men AND women, frequently, once we realized it was a mutual kink. But we usually restricted ourselves to like-minded people.
Did you have any kind of circumstances when you did it with your wife?
It had to be someone we both agreed on. The other would be in the room, though not always participating. If there was going to be bondage, there had to be a safeword. And anyone could call a halt to things at any time, no questions asked. Mostly, it was with other women. Not because I have an issue with guys, but because a lot of guys are weirded out about the idea of sharing a woman. For whatever reason, women seem to be less so. Less stigma attached to being bi-curious for them, I think.
I see. I guess everybody is different then.
I have no ideia why this is a thing either, it's just ridiculous and would make me sick too even by thinking of doing a thing like that with someone I loved. Well I have no clear ideia what to say bit watch for more red flags, usually if we love someone we aren't willing to share them. Have a good talk with him about that
Good to know there’s a guy who’s not into it too. Cheers man lol
Glad to help! lol
It means that he is mentally ill, and you too for being with him...
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