What should I do when my husband is watching porn in the next room?

Question

He sometimes wants to masturbate alone. But I would prefer having sex whenever horny. I just feel left out when he's behind closed doors. I want to accept this and take my mind off it when he's doing it but feelings of jealousy are getting in the way. I get upset with him when he comes out, I may have self-esteem issues. I do not want to be controlling either.

godfatherfan · Accepted Answer

Masturbation happens. Even if you said (and actually meant, which women never do) that you would have sex anytime, it won't matter. Sometimes we just want it to be about us, and don't want to have to go through the whole 'sexytime' production. When I was married, I rarely took my wife up on "quickies". I would feel bad she wasn't really getting anything out of it. So if I wasn't in the mood for everything that went into making us both happy, I just assume take care of it myself. Also, it really has nothing to do with you. Women want to think "oh, he thinks they are prettier then me" or "he wants them more then me". 99.9% of guys would want nothing to do with a gross porn actress. It is about us, not you.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Until you realize that porn is completely useless, you won't be able to make any progress with this. He has no reason to question his behavior because you are supporting it in other ways. It's likely he prefers doing it alone because it gives him a better dopamine hit due to the fantasy. You being present would mean reality.

Like I said. Once you understand what porn is, why it's free everywhere, and why it's pushed as being acceptable. You won't understand what's really happening.

GreatVallue · Accepted Answer

Porn introduces a world of sexual fantasies. You can't compete with that. Talk to him and try role playing.

integrale77 · Answer

Maybe you should start an xhamster account and hope he starts watching you and decides he needs to givest you the attention on

Mystery1900 · Answer

I gave up masturbation as I felt I was getting addicted to it. After giving it up my sexual relationship has slowly improved. This is the main reason I stopped masturbating. It is hard to try and repair that side of a relationship.

Summeroflove · Answer

Because it’s emotional cheating. You need boundaries that you only want a man whose only interested in you.

Fantasy now. You know if he was given the opportunity and wouldn’t get caught he would probably do it.

Plus. He’s doing it in his heart

Jdjfjcjj · Answer

Unless there is some large variance in effort put by partners (like I was consistently doing all the work), I would always prefer my partner over my hand. Masterbation would never even be necessary if getting enough.

IveGotNoName · Answer

Lol, would be a dealbreaker for me.

TroyDT2 · Answer

He'd rather watch porn than be with his wife? He's addicted and needs help.

JPresidente · Answer

Walk in the room with no clothes on and things will change.

MadClown · Answer

Sorry to hear this, it’s not your fault porn has ruined how people function, If a model was in front if him he would still go watch porn. now, you need to tell him to change his habits or else..

BJP21 · Answer

Watch it with him regardless of what he's into. Understand what fantasies he likes and maybe something good will come out of it the both of you can engage in. Maybe help him with his hard on and take advantage of him. I doubt he will want to be alone.

pizzalovershouse · Answer

Just get him to let you watch him do it with out porn on tell him you like watching him do it

DrewJohnson · Answer

Who doesn't enjoy a little porn and masturbation. What you're describing is problematic to your relationship. It might be time to get some help.

Jerre · Answer

Walk into the room naked, take a dildo or vibrator, sit where he can see you, then start masturbating. I bet before you cum, he’ll have his cock halfway into your pussy.