Why do guys get turned on by how much anal sex hurts us?

[ElizaPam]

Not that you guys know how it feels to have something rammed up your butt over and over but sometimes it seemed like the more pain I’m in the rougher my ex would be. Anal hurts it’s mostly a good manageable pain that makes me feel submissive but sometimes it’s a really bad pain.

Look guys anal hurts for us!! Especially when he just rams it in too fast it feels like you’re being stabbed! Literally!!

My ex knew this and he would just shove it in to make it hurt me. He would joke with his friends about how I would scream and beg him to take it out. He would practically rape me while I begged him to hurry and finish then he would tell me sorry for the butthurt. He really had fun doing that and when he told me he liked to do that on purpose I was SO MAD!!! 😡

Why do guys get turned on by hurting us with anal sex?

[nonratracereality]

It can come down to individual preferences and your interpretation of the whole sex act, what it entails and your overall ego ability to understand reality. Point said all activities, chores, and all that has to be done has the way to be done. Experience, skill, technique and attitude will depict how the person approaches each situation. With anal even though it is internal it is the same. Next if you dont love yourself and understand reality then all that should be happening and doesn't puts a strain on everyone. Everyone isn't an expert or proficient but maturity intelligence and responsibility will depict how the person not only approaches the sex but the person, their values and the person's demeanor. The less you know the worse it can be. So when you approach it's from your perspective but it should be both. When people are not what they expect in the bedroom there are ways that men counteract or so they think in order to get stimulated turned in or excited about the act. Lack of experience knowledge and technique leads to bad sex bad attitude and lack of empathy. So if the male sucks in bed or vice versa when the sex is initiated and the sex sucks and you want to be stimulated you either gain that through friction and most times the reaction gotten is one that stimulates one but hurts the other. Example intercourse but nothing is really happening except the motion. Now if this is the case then because there is no reaction by introducing more friction and action instead of it being pleasurable it is painful for one and pleasurable for the other. It's sad but this has been going on forever. Your grimace groan moan is a sign not necessarily the right sign that the action is producing results but for who. So by being with people who are sexually experienced knowledgeable and sensitive you can make this beautiful. Understanding the anus and everything surrounding it it can be approached with knowledge do that the act can be the way it can without the excess pain. There can be discomfort but with knowledge you know why. Answer the questions and you'll have the right answers and the right way to proceed. You may not achieve what you want but with time, patience and understanding it can be pleasurable without too much pain. If the sex sucks either abort make the best of it or introduce pain which solves the insensitive partners needs at the expense of their partner.

[Makeushiver]

Guys like anal for 2 reasons. I don't know if it's all guys or most but I'm sure the majority of men would not want to deliberately hurt a woman they are that intimate with. #1 reason is tightness which = more sensation #2 I think is the whiff of tabu that it has which always makes things sexier. Only do it with guys you trust but I guess trust or not this guy has been there and will assume he can go back whenever he wants. If you really think he's deliberately hurting you than I would get rid of him fast. BDSM is no fun with a true sadist.
I think you should at least talk to him before situation happens. I think what you can legitiimately say is, "I'm offering you something special because I know you enjoy it, I like it too when there's isn't too much pain. Use plenty of lube and when I say stop ir slow down I expect you to do so otherwise no more rosebud for you". I think that sends a nessage re: that particular problem & respect in general

[KelliCub]

Your issue has nothing to do with anal sex. It has to do with the fact that your ex was abusive. Deliberately hurting you sexually is no different than striking you in the face. He physically assaulted you, period. I’m very sorry this happened to you. He is disgusting and you were wise to separate from him.

Anal can be painful if a partner is not patient and you are not prepared or in the mood for it especially the first few times. That’s usually tolerable and expected because there is also pleasure from the act and both parties consent. Anal sex can be satisfying and pleasurable for both partners. I never felt a partner took pleasure in hurting me during anal. That’s just wrong.

[Anfin]

Girl... That's not okay at all.

With anal you have to be gentle, and really horny and relaxed. Then when it's all warmed up, and the muscles are relaxed, then you can go rougher. Use lube, take your time it is not supposed to hurt at all, you can damage yourself if you tear. Even if it is small tearing over time, so please be careful.

And if you begged him to stop, and he ignored that that's rape. You can withdraw your consent anytime, and he can't hurt you like that. I hope you're okay, and that you have someone to talk to about this. This isn't something you should go through alone, I'm so sorry for what's happened to you.

[btbc92]

The fact that nobody wants to point out the key word here is pornography just goes to show you how twisted people's minds are.

[zollo]

That's a definite outlier, Anal isn't supposed to hurt if you prepare the right way.

[johnkena]

Anal should hurt more because of smaller hole

[zollo]

@johnkena NO anal should NOT hurt more. The anus is still a muscle like the vagina and while the vagina can expand naturally when aroused and create it's own lubrication the anus can't expand to such a degree without preparation. Which you're SUPPOSED TO DO before Anal. Where as some women can just easily slip in a penis into their vagina without any fingering to loosen up the anus can never do that without preparation (unless you want a lot of pain and possible tearing). That means lots of stretching and lots of lube. But the fact that it's a "smaller hole" doesn't stop the anus because over time it can expand an amazing amount like up to the size of a wine bottle WITHOUT any pain.

[johnkena]

But its not mean to have sex anal naturally so it will hurt more Oh the shit will be out of pants easily😂

[laurieluvsit]

It's a form of high erotica for those guys who like a BDSM thrill

[heymynameisMatt]

Because they haven't yet learned that getting the girl off is the goal. And wanting to hurt a girl during sex would mean the guy kinda has issues. However, some girls get off on the pain fyi, so maybe the guy and girl would have great sex LOLOL.
I like when girls have orgasms. Thats just my thing though. 👌

[OlderAndWiser]

Anal does not need to hurt if you engage in enough foreplay and "warm up." All guys do not enjoy giving their partner pain. You just picked the wrong guy.

[Tyrael]

That's not "guys", that's one asshole who did that to you and you should've tossed his ass to the kerb the very first time he did that.

[TheorionMage]

Just guessing beyond his sadism, but...
deep down, males often paradoxically resent being evolutionarily subjugated by OUR vulnerability to YOUR Goddess-given allure.

What YOU want occasionally, we're predisposed to ache for, nearly continuously, with an eye out for ANY possible opportunity and anal sex has NO potential for conception except BAD aim.
So in your case an offer 'to drive you home' has an entirely dominant meaning~

[rachel776]

i think it's like that whole rape fantasy thing for them, which is why they pound us so hard in regular sex too

[integrale77]

TBH I'm not a big fan of anal I personally believe there are far nicer places to put my dick and only give anal if I'm with a girl who specifically asks for it!

Any girls with a guy who wants to give anal just because of the pain they give should dump the guy!

[Gooblegobble]

Your boyfriend was just trash, dude. Don’t put that on us.

[TonyV]

I dont know why they would like it, a humiliation or dominance thing I geuss.

Anal isn't suppose to hurt at all, it dosent have too.

Sounds like they didn't know what they were doing or they just didn't care to know.

And yes I have a little experience, I haven't been fucked in the ass but I have fucked myself in the ass, I took my time didn't force it and I got a pretty big dildo In my ass so i know it can be done without it hurting.
On other time i did hurt myself with a dildo half the size.

Point is anal takes patients and unfortunately most people dont give it the time it needs.

Oh and i have heard of women that only like anal cause it hurts, makes them feel humiliated and that's why they like it

[RolandCuthbert]

Dude, take one for the team.

Why are you complaining?

[SjE78]

if it hurts it isn't being done right... my last girlfriend loved it, even wanted to try it and then found she wanted to do it as much as she could... my first girlfriend tried after wanting to... and when rushed yeah it will hurt... but if it's done right and a taken time to prepare it doesn't hurt... this was from each woman i have spoken to about the matter, and by those past girlfriend's who i've had anal with...

and any relationship where i have taken part in the experience i would not continue if they were in pain...
it sounds like your partner who takes pleasure in your pain, is a serious low life...

[jshm2]

That was abuse by your ex, you dipshit (pun not intended), and you went ahead with it instead of calling it out as the act that it was.

You seem the obedient victim type. The sort that would date gaslighters and abusers and claim "oh men are just like that!"

No, deary. you just have a shitty taste in men. Again, pun not intended with all the anal jokes in this post. Sex is only called that when it's enjoyed consensually by both sides.

[TheLawAroundHere]

I dont know how you didn't slit his god damned throat. Activity like that is uncalled for. And should never be tolerated.

Im sorry that he put you through that.

If you are looking for some score settling, i have an idea. Get him just completely piss drunk. Then bang him lime your life depended on it. Let him do whatever he can think of. And even play into it a little.

After he passes out, grease up his asshole. Then grease up your curling iron. Tie his hands and feet down. Then stick that curling iron up his ass.

He will wake up with a jump. And rightfully so. Simply explain how he isn't going to do that to you anymore. Then, just to drive the point home... act like you are gonna plug the curling iron in.

Having his asshole cooked from the inside out might start to make up for the numerous assaults and raping he has done in the past.

After that, this guy will be transformed into the kind of guy thats worth going out with.

[Reaperbot666]

people was to much rough sex in porn to understand. that not everyone enjoys the same kind of sex in the same kind of way. but the overall goal for sex should be did you both get pleasure from it and did you both get to orgasm.

[josephinelcajon]

Anal sex done right and loving doesn't hurt at all! There is a lot of prep its not just lube up and shove it in. But once you are the penis rubs on the prostate that can cause a intense orgasm without touching the penis!

[UrBrotherCain]

women don't have a prostate sir.

[Cindy69]

Because the more it hurts us the more pleasure the guys gets especially when they shove it in or stick it in very fast and very hard so we can scream and cry out loud. I hear some of my ex bragging to his friends how much he hurt me and how much he made me scream and cry and beg him to stop he said the more I beg him to stop the rougher and meaner he got with me one time he hurt me so much I couldn't sit down for days

[JonJames]

So why did you keep doing it?

[MikeTheBartender]

Why do you date men like this if you don't enjoy it?

[bowenw]

A decent guy wouldn't hurt you, get off on your pain, or talk about what happens in the bedroom with his friends. If anal sex hurts, it's likely because it's not being done correctly and with good lube. If it's not for you just tell your partner. If it's a deal breaker for him, he needs to find a different girlfriend.