Why do men have to initiate sex?

Question

We’d die out if not for us begging.

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

I have never begged for sex. Even when I was a pathetic nice guy, I never begged for sex.

The trick is to keep your girl thinking about you. Tease her a bit in the morning - kiss her and squeeze her before you leave. Send her a quick text at lunch to keep her thinking about you. When you come home or when you see her, spend a good 60-120 seconds kissing her and making out a bit with her - give her your uninvited attention - before you sit down or whatever else. Make her feel paid attention to, and you will NEVER have to try hard at all to get sex. If she's been thinking about you all day, you need only stroke the top of her hand with a finger, or run your fingers through her hair, and she'll be grabbing your arm and pulling you into the bedroom (if she can wait that long).

Or, I can just whisper something dirty in her ear, and I can see her knees getting week and she'll be shifting her weight from side to side, desperate for some physical attention. But it's because I put in the effort throughout the day, so she's virtually ALWAYS ready.

Try it. You'll be amazed at how well it works.

God_of_Thunder · Accepted Answer

The trick is to figure what non-sexual things get them going, and then do that. A lot of guys think that initiating means something direct, like asking for sex, or physically touching her.

I enjoy initiating, but there are times when it's more fun to get her so turned on that she basically tackles me, because she wants me so bad. My girl loves when I make her laugh, and if the humor is a little risqué, or has some innuendo to it, then she becomes really affectionate.

She also loves when I do something physically challenging, so I will occasionally rearrange the furniture in the living room. It's funny to say it out loud, but move a couple of couches in front of her, and she immediately wants to try them out. 😂

At least in my experience, if you turn them on mentally, there is a much greater chance that they will initiate, but obviously all women are different, and YMMV. 🤷‍♂️

CourtneyJane2 · Accepted Answer

For the most part it's because of social conditioning. In western, patriarchal society, men are expected to initiate everything regarding relationships and intimacy while women have no agency, expected only to submit to her husband's whims.

Thankfully, that's all changing. I have no problem initiating sex with any willing partner, and I have done so on numerous occasions. Hell, some of the stuff I've done was straight up sexual battery and harassment, but the people I did that to wanted me as much if not more than I wanted them.

LilyoftheLake · Accepted Answer

We're pickier, especially since we're harder to turn on.

Katie1964 · Answer

Why do men have to initiate sex?

Hubby doesn't have to initiate it our house.

Most of the time he does, but that is because he has a higher sex drive than me and want sex more often. But I will initiate it probably once or twice a month, other than that he just beats me to it.

Slingblade1126 · Answer

That girl in your picture has dirty feet! How are you, OddBeMe? I'm not used to seeing you on this topic.

Sonorous · Answer

Never had it so I can't relate.

LazerBean · Answer

Mainly a problem for men who don't know the women they sleep with well.

Apple1996 · Answer

Find a woman that will initiate

Whatever2929292 · Answer

Just get married... Stop making even married relationships aren't ALL about sex. But wait until you get married and build a REAL bond

boldlyblu · Answer

Because I feel like they are intimidated to be dominated.

NathanDavis · Answer

we've had different experiences, lived different lives... lol

Texasgal95 · Answer

I think it’s because it’s more common for men’s sex drive to be higher but I know there are women that have a higher higher sex drive than their male partner it just depends

Sevenpointfive · Answer

initiate? sometimes its just a look. i've had sex with girls that i never learned their names

Stoner710 · Answer

because were dudes name Memelian animal species that does not have the mail initiate sex

Dargil · Answer

Because...

Dontaaaa · Answer

We don't, at least not all the time.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Because women.

es20490446e · Answer

I don't.

moonpie89 · Answer

It's sexy..

Pudsmucker · Answer

I find that quite interesting I have asking same question. A lot of women want to be coupled. But they don't like initiating, only when they're ovulating,

Guardian45 · Answer

No. I enjoy when a woman initiates, and she knows it.

Zolly99999 · Answer

Not all girls are like this but I do agree the vast majority are. . I have had a few almost attack me lol

AFretiredTXn · Answer

Would love to be seduced for a change.

msc545 · Answer

Women refuse to do this unless they get paid for it.

skeetskeetskeet · Answer

Because that's how the game Is set up. I don't really see the problem though... it's fun

driven159 · Answer

I havr had women initiate sex with me and I am sure more than me have had it too

dolemite89 · Answer

if it’s always u initiating ur with the wrong girl

Jackson619 · Answer

I don't I like to please first if there is a connection

pankyvic · Answer

Horn ASS TOADS

Anonymous · Answer

I do not know but it is so boring sometimes we must initiate it

Anonymous · Answer

We usually give very obvious signals when we want sex. You just think you initiate it.

Anonymous · Answer

I think most of the time men are unsure if women want to have sex with them or not so they have to wait for her to initiate. I think this comes from men avoiding sexual assault trouble too. Anyway, it will be nice if men change that dynamic once the relationship has consolidated.

Anonymous · Answer

That girl has dirty feet, so he probably won't initiate anything.

Anonymous · Answer

You tell us. Why do you, as a woman, make men always do the initiating? Or are you and your partner lesbians?

Anonymous · Answer

Great opportunity to over share

Well I think it’s them wanting to be submissive in some way. However My girlfriend said it’s because she doesn’t feel comfortable initiating sex so I stopped initiating sex. It’s gotten better but still she hasn’t started with foreplay that’s the next step.
Also she thinks she’s quote “I’m to old to jump your bone”
Or somehow if she initiates foreplay on me ie. Taking my clothes off, oral, kiss me and rub my manhood etc. she’s somehow submitting to the patriarchy.
I gave up a while ago after being rejected constantly, and 2years ago started trying to mend our relationship that was just kinda lost, but if she’s not going to put in some effort I’m not going to continue.
I think she needs therapy definitely has anxiety depression.

Why do men have to initiate sex?

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