Are people that say ''the past doesn't matter'' often just insecure about their own past?

this is mostly talking about sexual past, but i guess this can count for all aspects of your life

Are people that say the past doesnt matter often just insecure about their own past?
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Superb Opinion
  • Well that’s interesting considering there are both men and women who don’t want to expose their past.


    WHAT ON EARTH COULD BE SO BAD THAT YOU DID.

    Im not embarrassed of my past. I had to experience everything I experienced. I don’t consider anything a bad choice. I never smoked or drank or used any sort of dr—g. I never was arrested in my entire life. And in my love life. I’m glad I met some of the men I did. I learned what I enjoy in bed, I learned who I’m attracted to. I learned to respect myself. And I had fun. I was happy. If I never spread my legs, I wouldn’t have had some of the most mind blowing orgasms, that I still remember to this day. I wouldn’t have made out with some of the most handsome faces on earth. I would have made out with some of the most masculine lips on earth.

    And if I had the choice to redo it all, differently. I would do it all over again. I would enjoy my sexual experiences all over again. Specially those, with the men that meant the most to me.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I don’t know that it’s necessarily that simplistic. A lot of people choose not to focus on the past just because it doesn’t have much relevance to what they’re doing now, there are those that are running away from something they’ve done, and there are those that are insecure, but also it could be meant to be a comforting statement to whoever they’re talking to. For example, there are plenty of bi men afraid to tell their partners that they had an interest or experience with other men in the past and saying that is their partner’s way of saying “I’m not worried about your exes or that you like more than just women”

Most Helpful Guys

  • Past doesn't matter" can be 3 things...

    1) You fear your partner will judge you for it or feel insecure.

    2) You had low morals back then and are now ashamed of your own past, typically you're judging yourself.

    3) Your a normal person and the past actually doesn't matter, therefore you can talk about it openly without any negative feelings.

    Out of all my girlfriend's, my current one is number 3, which is literally the best and most fun thing ever

  • Ladies at large say this and when they do, their saying it because they know their past actions were shit. They either didn't listen to people scolding them or just didn't care for their future results, so-- you get what you get.

    You played around like a whore, you're future will know and you'll pay a big price for that.

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What Girls & Guys Said

14 22
  • It really depends on the person.

    Some aren't and know people can change and even the best people make mistakes, and they only care about what they and others do going forwards.

    Many say that you can't change the past, so why waste time worrying over the past instead of what you're dealing with now or what's next.

    Some may be insecure and feel uncomfortable hearing about their past mistakes.

    • Of the over 72 women that I can remember that I have had sex with not one of them were a mistake! Not ONE! Every one of them were willing and eager partners engaging in a memorable and exciting part of my sexual past of this human experience. I can say this as I only had sex with one married woman in my life and she was the hottest lady from my past. She told me I had an irresistible ass (never understood that... lol). Avoid banging married people. Period. There is something about doing that that will affect your journey through life. There are countless single people today looking for sex. If you are yet to know who they are then spend some time to learn what the opposite sex is seeking in fulfilling their desires. The journey is worth it. You will be amazed at what you do not understand of the opposite sex> Here is a hint... When it comes to sex humans are animals!

  • Us guys can't help but wonder of all the dick she has had. However, there is no way to undue the past so I have chosen to accept all these past guys as training tools for my woman who can so easily get me hard day after night after day after night...

  • When they say their past shouldn't matter, i just take it as, they were making hoe moves with little to no regrets. I personally care about the both of our pasts. I don’t want a hoe, but i’d take a remorseful hoe over a proud one.

  • Very interesting reading about other users thoughts and reflections. We, as a married couple, decided early into our relationship that we will share of our past, to the extend we believe is relevant and the other can ask whatever question they wish to know. A lot of our past experiences, especially sexual ones, doesn’t have much relevance to what the future will hold for us. If we believed something could be key experience which can affect the relationship further down, we stated it. As an example, I shared my curiosity with defining my own orientation and experiences I've had. She wanted me to spare the details but took onboard the overall information.

    I guess what what could be bad, is the fact that you enter a relationship, let alone a marriage, not coming clean about your orientation or even doubting your own, and you end up hurting your partner and waisting their time to find true love.

  • It's one, of the possible scenarios.

    I use this phrase, because I'm at peace with my past (sexual and not) and it doesn't matter anymore.

    I had a friend and before I felt connected to him enough to talk about my past, he was saying this phrase in a very irritated voice :D and the meaning was like "Come on, Isla, let it out, ffs!"

    So, the context, the current situation and myriad of other factors create the meaning of that phrase.

  • No, sometimes it’s true. Mostly. Everyone beyond their mid twenties has a past.

  • It May mean that the individual who feels that way is ready to move on from their past and make changes, or is going to continue on with their lifestyle and hopes/ expects others to be fine with their choices.

  • Sometimes. Or they’re not secure enough to know about their partners past. Honestly I trust people more that have been through the ringer and came out on top than someone who has lived a “easy” life and hasn’t learned from life experiences, they usually have ignorance with their head up their ass

  • If they are talking about themselves, then normally yes. I do think a lot of those people do genuinely believe that about prospective partners as well though.

  • Sometimes yea

  • Yess these type of people tend to be very insecure. They know that they made bad choices in the past but don't wanna own up to them.

    • ... Yet, didn't you write a Mytake that a woman's past doesn't matter because everyone has a past or was that someone else?

    • @Inbox I've only ever written one mytake and it was a all about me

  • If you're talking sexual past, then it's either the person not talking about it being insecure, or they think it will make you insecure. Past relationships can also be painful to talk about.

    When I first read the question I didn't see the flavor text about sex and just took it in a more general sense. In that context I think it's even less black and white- it could be for a number of reasons and it's anyones guess but lots of people don't like dwelling on the past. We live in the present after all.

  • the reason why the past doesn't matter is because we literally can't change it. the most you can do is sulk on it. but that does nothing.

  • past matters, if anyone says it doesn't they are either insecure about it or just bitches/cucks

  • Not all of them no. I have very little sexual past and I say that.

  • It is mostly women with a promiscuous past that can't pair bond and will never be a good p9that say the past doesn't matter.

    Some desperate men also say it in Hope's of getting those low quality promiscuous women.

    Good people know that a person's past shows their morals, their values, and their ability to be a good or bad partner.

  • The very statement is a red flag itself.

    Whoever states, "the past does not matter," is implying they have something to hide. If the past truly did not matter, then why don't they share their past? Clearly, that person is ashamed of their past and creates an excuse in hopes to avoid responsibility for it. If they cannot own up to their past, how will they not repeat it?

  • I think people have their own preferences and beliefs. If you think that a girl that has a body count in the triple digits is not serious about relationships that is somebody';s opinion.

  • Your past definitely does matter, so people saying the past doesn't matter are definitely guilty or lack any sense of logic.

    If you kill someone without a legitimately good reason, does that past not matter? What about if you raped someone? What about if you have a history of shoplifting? The same relates to if you spread your legs for 30 guys. And the scary thing is there are girls out there that think that number is really low.

  • The past is just a path to the future so how it doesn't matter. Everything good or bad in the past shaped who u r NOW. If u had good parents that affected u. If u had an injury then it did affect u now. U were a child in the past thats why u r an adult now. Our past is us

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