#PleaseRead Does this story add up?

STORY— He joked about hitting a woman. I was like, I dont play that. Then he tried to explain the only time he would. I told him i didn't wanna hear it. Then he followed up with “Well i already have a restraining order against me. Someone on the rival team ran up on me. I punched him one good time. They had to call an ambulance. His mom got involved and took me to court. They charged me with misdemeanor assault/battery and told me, either a year in jail or 3 years of probation with community service and paying dudes ambulance fees. They also sent me to anger management classes.”
QUESTION— How could one punch send someone to the hospital? aren't restraining orders for if you repeatedly harass someone? Jail for one punch? Anger management must be a hell of a course because he always seemed as sweet as can be. I’m uneducated on this subject so thats why im asking why the story sounds like a lot is being left out. Anyways, I was already leaving him because he's obsessed with anal and that ain't my style. I dont even like when he calls me sweet cheeks anymore because im starting to see why. But this story just topped the ballpark for me 🙈🤦‍♀️
#FeelFreeToList #SomeoneExplainThis
Updates:
+1 y
To clarify, i said i didn't wanna hear about the one time he’d hit a woman. So he switched over to when he got in a fight with a male teammate and a 20 year old teammate tried to tackle him from behind while he was trying to fight someone else. He himself is almost 30. Also, i told him i wasn't about anal but he kept tryna tell stories to get me into it. Automatic turnoff and i kept cutting him off. he's never come across as verbally aggressive to me but im tryna head out either way
+1 y
To clarify further, I wouldn't say he was bragging about this fight. He seemed emotional when telling it and i could tell he seemed nervous to tell the details (yet he brought it all up without me asking). He was also nervous to tell me about his custody battle. Then again, he told me he got into it with his exes new man. He said the man called the cops on him for doing something. He told me the cops just asked questions and left. But come to think of it, it was prob another physical fight 🤦
2 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • That loser sounds like a jackass. He was likely abusing and beating his ex girlfriend a lot until she got a restraining order against him and he got sent to jail (jailtime and restraining orders are not given out lightly and that kind of thing doesn't just "happen" to someone). If someone ends up there that is solely on them and their actions alone.

    I would say he likely felt awkward about bringing up his past abuse he does to woman based on his personality and attitude towards them. You definitely made a good call trusting your gut and ditching that sexist jackass. He likely brought up a past fight he was (likely not) in with a dude to normalize his actions that hitting someone is ok (it's not and he knows it). If he thinks you being ok with him hitting other men is ok then to make the jump to him hitting you isn't to much further of a stretch after that in his mind. He's trying to downplay the seriousness of his poor life choices and normalize them (which they aren't). I'm glad he's in the past for you now! You certainly deserve better than to be stuck with that in your life.

    • Dang you're right

  • Your bullshit detector is good. He is completely full of shit. Hospital? Possible, if you are a professional fighter etc, but unlikely. And there is no WAY he get jail time for that, and probation? No way, then he made the lie just comical saying it was three years probation. The worst he would have received was a fine.
    He sounds like one of those clowns who always has to talk about how tough he is... a bragger... ugh what a douche.
    Is this sexy voice guy from your last post?

    • Lol yes thhis is sexy voice guy. But he didn't even brag. He seemed nervous to tell me cause he knew i’d leave

    • If it were me, and the story were true, I would be very ashamed of it. Definitely not something I'd talk about that early. So the moron couldn't take the hint that you weren't down for anal... so stupid. Again, why is that something he would not only bring up, but basically push on you? I just don't get what these dudes are thinking.

    • I told him straight up im not into it but he kept tryna tell me why i should be. And yea I don't know what he's thinking but im just gonna avoid him now

Most Helpful Girls

  • One punch could send someone to the ER but it's rare. Restraining orders come in many different varieties and for many reasons, and for different lengths of time. Jail for one punch is highly unlikely especially on first offense. Anger management class is pretty standard part of probation.
    In summary, I AGREE, there's a TON HE'S LEAVING OUT!! --
    (Good luck sweet cheeks! I think you should RUN while you still can!)
    ;)

    • Lmao not the sweet cheeks 🤣

    • Just kidding ya with that... that part cracked me up!

  • Nah you can literally just touch someone. That's battery. And the court can issue a restraining order. Wich they usually do so it looks better for the alleged victim. Then they try to scare the u with a year and offer u 3months so you can fuck up on your probation and do more time. I would say guy sounds like trouble. But he's being pretty honest and I think that's hard to find these days.

    • Also the anal thing. U need to speak up. He probably doesn't even know because he can't see ur expression from the back!!

    • Yea im shocked he's so honest. And no i made it clear plenty times im not into anal. He tries to describe it in a way so you’d give in. So i was already ready to leave

    • Not cool.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • It's possible that his story is true just as he told it, but in my opinion, it's a lot more likely that there was a lot more going on than he's admitting too, and it seems likely that he has a longer history of violence than just the one incident.

    • Yea probably so

  • If these'flags" are coming out already before it's even"official"... You're doing the right thing to end it now... What other"flags" might pop out... And whether it's a man or woman, to hit someone that hard, that they have to go to hospital, that's a violent person there... Anger management can work for some, but if this was a recent event... That's probably not a significant enough time to be healed...

    • Yea im def bout to head out 🤣

    • Yeah, don't walk... RUN!!!

  • I didn't understand the "him' in "I punched him" and all that. Wasn't he talking about punching a woman? Anyway, the story does add up to me, if the person punched was a woman. People can be really sweet at first, when in reality they're monsters. The fact that he's obsessed with anal too kind of adds to his aggression towards women (I'm not saying every other man that likes anal is like that at all, I'm saying is in this particular case, I suspect such desire isn't coming from the right place). Also, you don't joke about a thing like that, especially to a woman you're dating. He must be some sort of weirdo

    • No i told him i didn't wanna hear the story about the one time he’d hit a woman. So he switched over to when he beat up a rival teammate

    • Yes, that sounds weird to me, but I don't know about the rules in your country. I never heard of anyone having a restraining order on another man for punching them. There'd be a lot of restraining orders in that case

    • Anyway, it does sound like this guy does have issues. Even if he were making this up, it's still something really weird to make up

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  • no it does not and you leaving the guy is better than you burying him in the back yard and also its a lot cheaper >_> not saying i know how much things cost just saying it would be cheaper >_> .

    • Lmao i wouldn't kill him 🤣

    • lol ok but i you ever do i will be your alibi , and you can delete this in case you need to get rid of evidence XD


  • "He joked about hitting a woman." Some things should never be the subject of a "joke," and this is one of those things.

    “Well i already have a restraining order against me.". He called it a restraining order but it is probably a condition of his probation. However, restraining orders are used for violence, harassment, or stalking, thought it is usually applied to dating or family relationships.


    "They also sent me to anger management classes.” Actually, those classes are not that wonderful someone is already highly motivated to change. He just knows how to mask his explosive personality.



    "How could one punchsend someone to the hospital?" One punch can cause loss of consciousness and that would almost always be a reason to go to the hospital.

    "Jail for one punch?". You want to tell someone like this that they get one free punch?

    "Anyways, I was already leaving him because he's obsessed with anal and that ain't my style." I'll bet he was always pressuring you on that subject. When someone doesn't respect your boundaries, that is your warning sign.

    Leave him and be safe! When you break up, do it in a public place, middle of the day.

    • He def must know how to hide it because he seemed so sweet and softspoken. And yea the pressuring of anal is why i was leaving in the first place. But both convos happened the same night so thats why he carried on over to the punch topic. And lol we werent official yet. We were in the beginning stages so it’ll be easier to leave him

    • Good luck. Be careful with this breakup our you may see his evil side.

    • I may have to ghost but i rather not

  • I think restraining orders are something the victimized party takes out on the aggressor. Say I was being stalked a restraining order would come about IF I decided I wanted one, its not something the police or a lawyer will demand, although police or a lawyer or a judge might recommend it.

    Its hard to piece it all together but it seems like he isn't telling everything but one thing is for sure, the dude most likely has issues with handling his anger and violence. Maybe his anger management classes made a difference and he is a changed man. But if you feel its still a red flag I would say you are totally justified.

    • Yea he seems like a changed guy but i dont wanna take any risks. And yea i feel like he left some of the story out

  • Red flags!

    • Yea im leaving him. I just wondered if the story adds up lol

  • Well if he's telling the truth he's not such a great guy and if he's lying it's too impress you or he thinks that's a cool kind of guy to act like, both of which are stupid and suck. I personally wouldn't brag about being a out of control violent guy who gets in fights and if I thought a girl would be impressed by something so dumb she ain't the one for me, miss me with that dumb shit.

    The anal thing, yeah that's bad, he's trying to pressure you into something you've clearly said you dont want to do.

    Kind of off topic but how soon should a guy ask if a girl is into that? It's something I want to try and would kind of suck to get semi serious only to find out she ain't about it.

    • I dont feel he was bragging. He seemed nervous to tell me about the situation. And i think its good to talk about during the first sexual convo which could be within a weeknor whenever. But just the fact he's been rawdogging ass, i no longer would even want to think of sticking his dick in my mouth. Its a turnoff to me

  • Anger management might be working for him if he's taking it seriously, but I would never judge a guy based on how sweet he is in the beginning. Sweet talkers can still snap on you later, once they've gotten comfortable

    • Yea i see that now

  • Well, the one punch thing is a bit unbelievable but the restraining order can be believable because his mother got involved and everyone knows that things get a bit messy when mothers get involved. But its still not believeable that he got a guy in hospital after one punching him then ends up in anger management classes, that is only possible if he has a lot of cases of violence and evidence for proving that.

    • Yea and forgot to mention, he's almost 30 years old. He beat up someone whos like 20

    • Ohhh, so the one punch thing definitely pans out. And since he is only 20 then i suppose the restraining order and anger management class is true because he technically beat a child like person.

    • Well damn

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  • One punch can seriously hurt someone and possibly kill someone if done right. All of the above to the effects of the punch because that is immaturity to hurt a person like that. Only if it's self defence should you use a punch that powerful

    • It was self defense. The guy ran up on him

    • Interesting 🤔

  • People can really have a split personality: being sweet 98% of the time but than slamming you into hospital when something winds them up.
    Than they'll feel eternally sorry and you may forgive them, but 2 months later it just happens again.
    Alcohol can often play a role ☹

    • Yea its crazy that he could be bipolar. And yea he does drink sometimes

  • No it doesn't.

    Ditch him

    • I am

  • Well, he could have been charged with 2nd or 3rd degree battery.. Which can be classified as a felony leadin 2,3, or 5 years in prison.. But that was one punch and not with a deadly weapon so it seems the most he would get is a misdemeanor maybe and I don't think that'snowhere near enough for a restraining order.. Unless dude was so scare of that one punch that he didn't wannabe by him anymore.. So it's weird he was definitely leavin stuff out.. Unless he was a repeat offender.. Either that or he was just makin it up.. But yeah the story doesn't add up..

    • He said it was misdemeanor assault/battery but with a restraining order, anger management and 3 years probation. Like that def sounds repetitive assult

    • The means it was probably a repeated asault.. I don't know how it could be battery he didn't beat him.. Although here in Illinois assault is verbal threat, and battery is actual physical touch.. So it could work like that where he is from too.. But, one punch definitely wouldn't be enough to do that.. Either he was lyin about whole thing, or he tried to make himself not look bad by soundin like a violet weirdo.. LOL..

  • Depends, if he had a history it might add up that that was the threshold.../breaking point. Additionally why bother eith him anyways... u desperate or something? I just don't understand... doesn't seem like a perticularly stable or unbelievably smart type/kind of guy...

    • Im not desperate. I just found this info out last night and clearly stated above that im leaving thank you very much

    • But if he's on probation... wasn't it apparent?

    • I didn't find out about aaaany of the above until last night. Otherwise i wouldve been gone

  • That’s a bit odd. Either way, ditch him.

    • Im gonna try to ease away. I rather not straight up ghost

    • You’re better than I am

  • Well at least that penchant for anal should serve him well in jail...

    • Lmao 🤣🙈

  • I get it, things happen and sometimes lead to physical altercations. But he sounds like he has anger issues. I'm out.

    Be careful.

    • Yea im leaving

    • Good ❤

  • One punch is possible. My dad hit a guy and he needed surgery. Nothing in his hand or anything I was there, it all depends where he hits him at. He definitely has anger issues and it seems like he would be a woman abuser or he's just trying to impress you. He seems pushy and would try to force you to do things he wants even if your not okay with it. Avoid at all costs for your safety!

    • Yea im gonna avoid him

  • You're able to Kill a person with one punch actually. One wrong angle or falling wrong after the initial punch and it can be over just like that.

    • Oh damn

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