What do you think about someone that has a rape fantasy?

Question

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

I think that person is messed up sexually. I know there are people who will say "it's just a fantasy" but that is a minimization and denial.

It comes down to likely one of these:

They've been sexually abused or violated at some point in their life and associate sex with violence.
They want to feel the centre of attention and being this gets them off.
This is how they imagine anonymous sex with complete strangers. There is no emotional entanglements to consider. Maybe they are 'stuck' in an unsatisfying monogamous, safe but dull relationship and wish for something else. The less they know them, the more animalistic it is, the hotter they think it will be.
They want to be the passive, subordinate object of 'overwhelming desire', and if it's from a stranger, or violent, or illicit, or involves more than one person, it doesn't deter them; they think it may actually heighten their pleasure through this passivity (gang bangs are an even more extreme, i. e. worse, example.)
They lack self-confidence, associate sex where they are active with feelings of guilt, and cannot fully enjoy sex, or in their minds the penultimate sex is one of loss of responsibility; of another taking over, taking control, and being in charge of their pleasure. Only then can they fully give in to the act.
They care little-to-none for careful and cognizant word selection, so they use the term 'rape' to also broadly encompass any highly intense sexual event. And this is a crime in itself - to minimize and bastardize the true meaning of the word, and to include themselves in a group of which they mean as a joyful, happy experience, with those who have been heinously violated. Never, ever conflate the two. One is a victim of assault; the other wants to get off sexually.

I don't care which one of these it is. They're all terrible and I am disgusted with the term and concept.

CrazyGirl2 · Accepted Answer

I think that it is CLEARLY a sign that they were never actually raped, and have no idea what it feels like to be robbed of your agency! To be lifted bo a man weighing more than three times what you weigh, and tossed onto a bed like a rag doll, then held down while your panties are pulled off! Because TRUST me, when your uncle does that... your father’s brother, a man who looks just like your own father, and he does it on your 13th birthday! I PROMISE YOU, it’s certainly NOT a fantasy, it’s a goddamn nightmare!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

My current girlfriend has it. We haven't done anything in that regard. She is currently undergoing therapy and hasn't mentioned it over a year. I asked last time and she said she was getting over some of these. Therapy did help in clearing her fantasy a bit more. I am confident by the time she finishes her therapy, she will not have it.

I dont mean to say that there is something wrong with this fantasy. The thing is, it is not as easy and simple as it sounds. It is much more complex. I can't even dare to try to explain it.

Nalix · Accepted Answer

It's fairly normal. The fantasy part is fine, even acting it out is usually fine, so long at it is consensual. I sort of do, but mine isn't actually possible since it involves a mind control pussy being used on me. That's kind of like rape, right?

In any case, power exchange fantasies are normal, and even healthy, including rape fantasies, so long as you only ever act them out with someone you trust and you both understand that. Maybe even sign the right papers beforehand. Use good judgement.

MrOracle · Answer

Many, many women do. I understand it - despite their feminist training, LOTS of women, way down deep, strongly desire being dominated by a strong man, and this desire, when it isn't met, comes out in things like rape and/or domination fantasies.

meetkitty123 · Answer

I believe the concept of "rape fantasy" is nonsense! It is not glorifying or fantastic. Rape such is a horrific traumatizing and violent act. It's not a game. It's not a subject of entertainment. It is very mentally unhealthy to see as such.

AustinMan · Answer

Perfectly normal. Why do you ask?

Bee-Hatch · Answer

I guess if it's your thing and it's done in a way that's consenting (kind of goes against the idea of a rape fantasy) then no problem I guess.

Hogwheels · Answer

Be safe about it. CNC play is common and normal, but you should definitely use a safe word and only with someone you trust. I recommend you and whoever you plan to do this with research together first on how to do CNC safely. It can be embarrassing to do this with your significant other, but doing research together actually adds another level of trust, love, and intimacy.

MrNameless · Answer

It's a fantasy, but its really a domination fantasy that you have control over in your head. Actual rape is not planned, without consent and scary AF.

Wade8888 · Answer

Highly dysfunctional, needs psychotherapy and counseling.

Vencam · Answer

I'm pretty sure there is a consistent group of men who fantasize about women being raped (or even with them as the rapist) a smaller group of women fantasizing about men being raped (same as men) but I have no idea about how many fantasize about being raped, either by the same or opposite sex...
Overall, I'd say it's a pretty common fantasy, and I don't have any particular bias or preference towards such people.
As long as it is only a FANTASY, that is...

CometoMee · Answer

Never understood this before.

ohshee · Answer

It's a Fantasy that's all it is yo have a liver that can take her there to experience it a lot of girls have that fantasy they also have fantasys about being gang bang ,, make 2 signs.

This line. Fantasy rape line up here
This line real rape line up here
What line will have the most girls in it

FlyGirl95 · Answer

I respect the fantasy absolutely. We all have fantasies no matter who we are. When someone is sharing their fantasies that is a very private and intimate matter. It takes trust and respect on both sides. Fulfilling a fantasy is a part of every great relationship on both sides men and women. And there should be no subject that is taboo or weird. If a man wants his balls electrocuted while having sex with a porcupine then be respectful. As a couple decide how to make it happen and do it out of love ❤️❤️❤️

Dazed0N0Confused · Answer

I think it's odd. I wouldn't want to participate in this kind of fantasy...  I like to do and try a lot of things, but that's a bit far...

Bratsondanielle · Answer

Totally normal. We do it at least once a month

Alyssa11 · Answer

I’d be scared lol

BlacklightShade · Answer

It’s perfectly natural to have such fantasies as long as no one gets hurt.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

Pretty common for a lot of women, but it honestly puts me off. Role playing has limits in my head and doing a rape fantasy is not something that sits right with me.