Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health Why do some guys think they’re entitled to sex?
StormMistress Xper 7
Like seriously I’ve dated and befriend so many guys where things are great and peachy but as soon as they realise sex is off the table they get hostile and want nothing to do with me. Some have even said they deserve it considering the effort and money they’ve put into the relationship. Like dude wtf.
Updates:
+1 y
a lot of confusion here. What I mean is that sex is off the table until I can see if we have chemistry which can take 2 or more dates. If we don’t then I end it. I’m not going to waste my time if we don’t click. It’s guys who get upset with this because they got nothing out of it that I have an issue with.
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What Girls & Guys Said
19 116Those are called r/niceguys and if you head over to reddit, you'll read all about them.
You'll realise you've dodged so many bullets you should buy a lottery ticket.
I suppose they have the misconception that doing things for you means you should give them the pussy.
However, I as a guy also get annoyed at the way women feel that they're entitled to me spending my money for them when we go out, or thinking they can hit me up for money any time they're desperate and down on their luck, which has happened more than once. When you don't give in they get mad and think you're not being a "real man."
@stormmistress Just a question about your question: why is it that when/if men are wanting or looking for sex that it's inconvenient for women, but if women are looking for sex - and say they can go get it when they want - they don't want to be judged for that?
It's called reverse roll play just think at one point women really needed men because we're the hunters not women now majority are over weight like LINEBACKERS for the most part
As an older lady you should be trying to give it away to the right guy of course 😉
I've heard from people that it’s the energy.. but, i honestly do not believe this.. I think they’re maturity has a HUGE play in it and their insecurities as well.
U somekind of feminists or something if u are in relationships of course ur partner will expect something in return u can't expect he keep wasting time and all time on u and return he won't expect anything the way u are thinking is totaly feminist and i won't doubt because u added "Mistress" after ur name
30?
Are you still out there dating?
You haven't landed a guy yet?
Anyway, what do you mean "sex is off the table"?
Why are these guys spending time with you... are you out on a date? If you are dating a man what do you mean by sex is off the table? Forever? He is just some friend zone person you are hanging out with or sex isn't off the table you just want to get to know him more first and have more dating time between you before you get physical?
Men and women have sex... that is the major spark/draw that brings men and women together. Sure you don't... shouldn't do that on the first date but things will usually be heading in that direction as 2 date each other.
Who are the men? Are they men you are dating?
What does off the table mean?
What I mean is I want to see if we have chemistry before I engage in sex. Especially if I’m serious about the guy wanting me for me and not just my body. Finding out if you have chemistry takes a few dates and some guys get upset if I end it because of the fact. Since they feel because they’ve invested their time and effort (which I have too by the way) they deserve a reward.
Nothing wrong with that, Storm.
So they expect sex on the first date. Yeah that is too fast.
Guys spend 500X more time watching videos and TV and hanging around with their male friends. None of that teaches a guy about what a girl wants! Or for that fact, what they need, desire, or think. Face it: when you want a serious hook up with a guy, you need to choose one of these 2 choices: 1. Marry a guy who has a terrific relationship (as in can talk to her freely) with his mom 2. Just realize that you have a reaaaaallllllyyyyy long job of coaching your mate. It's rare that you find a very sensitive guy who understands women. The reason is that men are brought generally brought up to believe that all the world is theirs if they are smart enough and/or strong enough. It translates to thinking that the bold and the beautiful automatically gives rights to them. Not joking at all. It's just the way it is. I happen to have graduated from the coarsest to the finest—buy it was a long time before I woke up.
Maybe because it's because it's the only thing of value you have to offer them.
Wait are you have a go at me or was this just a general statement?
Like... what if they thought you were hot but didn't find you all that spectacular as a person or friend?
I can’t really relate honestly. I’d never date a guy just because he’s physically attractive. That’s super shallow and truth be told how boring would that be.
Guys don't get to be so picky... and most women are boring anyway.
We are not boring!!! Guys who care only about cars and sports? That’s bloody dull as hell.
Well yeah, compared to some women who just watch tv and use social media for hobbies.
That’s people in general though Not really gender specific. I personally love multiple things. Fitness, gaming, stitching, dancing, socialising, reading, cleaning, collecting, drawing etc. everyone is different.
Right... so let's see, the only thing we really have in common is gaming, and I doubt we play the same games. So the only reason I'd ever want to have anything to do with you is for your body... right? And there is no reason you'd want to have anything to do with me, so I'd have to make a reason, ie, buy you shit, take you out places, inflate your ego, all that other stuff guys do when they want to please a woman... so if it turns out you were just being my "friend" you'd see why I'd be a bit pissed off after putting in all that effort. I don't actually do that... but you see my point? Lots of guys spend time on women solely because they want access to their bodies.
@Celtero I somewhat agree with Celtero. Your GAG profile makes you sound very interesting, like someone worth getting to know. But then you have your giant tits as your avatar photo and unironically ask why some men see you as a sexual object. Do women not see how stupid they look asking this while displaying their body like that on social media or dating apps? Some men are not very subtle; you show them tits; their mind immediately goes to sex. You don't want to be made into a sex object; don't show off your body in such a way. And yes, I know you're talking about real world interactions. But if this is how you display your GAG avatar, it stands to reason you might dress this provocatively in the real world, as well. Usually, people judge you based on how you put yourself out there. Saying "I am not a sex object, but take a look at my big ol' giant mega-tits" is all kinds of mixed messages. It's like laying food out in a bowl on the floor, and then getting pissed off when it runs over and starts eating it. "That food wasn't meant for you, Fido! That was MY food!" Also, I agree with Celtero. Most women (and men, to be honest) ARE boring. Women are never socially penalized for not having a personality unlike men however, so women can get away with being boring far more often.
@Celtero You are dropping truth bombs, here. I agree with you, but these men are at blame, as well. In the actual book, "No More Mr. Nice Guy," they call that "Unspoken contracts." As in, "men will do nice stuff for women, to 'buy' their way into sex." They're chumps for doing that simp nonsense. I'd ideally want a nice woman like many guys, but I know I don't have the height or looks for that, and if I have to spend money on a woman in order for her to pay attention to me, then that's just idiotic from the get-go. In other words, if a woman is going to like me, I don't need to spend money to get her to do it. And if she wouldn't talk to me unless I did, then she doesn't like me, to begin with. Some guys are suckers to still think it's 1955 and that taking a girl to Rd Lobster or something means sex at the end of the night.
Also, that first comment was meant for @StormMistress. "Your GAG profile makes you sound..."
Mainly because they are approaching sex the wrong way. They keep doing things for a girl expecting sex, but either there isn't clear communication, or the girl has plausible deniability. Sex isn't that rare of a commodity as some guy's thing, if it's legal where you live, see a professional sex provider.
On the other hand, some women also think that commitment is owed to them, and they are entitled to it.
That's the million dollar question?
Just as it says on the tin, they feel entitled to what they're not entitled to.
People, in this case, men, want what they can't have.
Because their irresponsible parents have taught them to feel entitled to everything.
Because we are !!! ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-)
Seriously, some guys have huge egos when it comes to sex. As they get older, those egos will shrink.
I honestly don't know why that happen or happens.
Serously, what's the point of dating someone, if sex isn't going to be a part of the relationship?
The whole point of dating is to build a relationship where both parties get what they want and need from each other, including plentiful sex, otherwise there's no point in even attempting a non-platonic relationship to begin with. He'd be better off just being a platonic friend with you, and find another woman that will be interested in: A) hooking up, or B) building a meaningful, non-platonic relationship.
Most guys interested in actually dating someone are looking for "B."
* Men typically want companionship, food, and sexual affection from a relationship.
* Women typically want to gain status, safety, emotional affection, and financial wellbeing, from a sexual companionship.
* Relationships of the non-platonic kind are, when broken down to it's absolute core elements, a transaction of sorts, and women typically get the better deal, so don't be so unwilling to give your man the sex he wants and needs.
its not entitlement. I promise , the symptoms you're dealing with is return for return. If he didn't feel like he could earn it unless he was a genuine friend expectant to be in the friend zone who knows thats where they are comfortable , or the other extreme ego -centric. if this is a common thing.. which it sounds like it is. I promise You are gonna wake up with this secret info. Women do it too in other ways. if a dude you kinda don't like approaches you and/or aren't really liking his approach.. you have or someone you known has, brushed him off. its the exact same tactic but in reverse.. and ultimately why you brushed him off, is not because you really hate him, its because you really don't want to like him.. its a defense mechanism to protect your heart,, and allow you to pair bond latter. When dudes do it, its kinda passive aggressive and seams very fucked, because he hasn't awoken too the other fish in the sea aspect yet, meaning he feels you're his only choice.. and that makes him less attractive , or worse , makes you feel less attractive , because you couldn't believe you liked him.. for him he's being rude, because it protects his heart. I don't believe I am entitled to sex, but I have expectations and these are not like , do your home work and obey the law expectations.. these are like , i kinda would love to eat some cake expectations. . there's also the white knight dudes... who really are not realizing that should be more reserved.. for a real women.. a real damsel in destress.. and they aren't the only option, but you do it because you should protect a women,, but men were literally bred by other men who protected females.. so the white knight's need to tone down that instinct. Its sorta an egocentric problem.. IT should be THE older a man gets the better he becomes.. BUT it is not like that.. its either you are a wise man, who knows how to treat women , your just a chad who doesn't hurt when rejected.. or your a dumbo who lets his feelings get hurt all the time.
Did they try to initiate the act on too short time tables?
Like seriously, put yourself in their shoes. Would you want to get your money taken and not get a blow job?
Why do some women think they are entitled to be wined and dined, driven around in my BMW, go with me on vacations in Europe etc? Just asking for a friend!
Well if we were dating, I’d expect that we actually go on dates, it’s kind of implied. Regardless of your relationship with someone that doesn’t entitle them to your body, weather you’re dating or married.
@Subarugirl Let me give you an example! I am not in any kind of an exclusive relationship with a woman. I see different women all the time. It's like this! If I take her out and I ask her about coming back to my place OR we just have dinner at my place I don't force the issue. If I want to be intimate with her afterward but she gets ready to leave I won't waste my time on her anymore. I don't ask or beg for bedtime. I have admitted more times than I can remember. I am broken. I was betrayed a long time ago and I simply no longer trust women. To me, my wallet and her body are joined. If she wants in my wallet I want access to her body! Is that right, who the hell knows! I am 63 and know dozens of women from around 30 to almost 50. Do you want to play those games with me? I just move on!
I’m married but just because he pays the mortgage doesn’t mean that he is entitled to my body.
@Subarugirl I'm not engaging in a debate with you! You have the right to your body! I fully understand that and I also respect it. Still, you are missing my point. Just as you have the right to control your body I have the right to spend my money and time as I see fit. I will NOT waste either with a lady that will not give me access to her body! I am not some pimple-faced 16-year-old boy! I am honest and upfront, with every woman, I take out. Trust me, no sex no return call!
As long as you’re upfront about it
@Subarugirl I was reviewing some of my comments and noticed I come off like some sex monster! I need to walk back some of those comments a bit. Sure, I have different partners. I am also a 63-year-old man that does not have the libido I had 30 years ago. I have just about as many instances of being the one not wanting to be physical as the woman. I also go out with a lot of women that are in my friend zone. I don't date married women, just not something that appeals to me! I like to be around women that are educated and articulate. I also do most of the cooking when I have ladies over! I stay away from drama and want to spend the remaining years I have to enjoy life and in peace.
No man can be friends with a woman he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her. Am I saying guys can be friends with unattractive women? No, they pretty much want to nail her down too.
mostly, very much, true. Some girls that I am attracted to though I dont want to necessarily "nail them down". Its nice to have a pretty girl's attention and validation and she can draw more girls to the guy! :D but also there's a few very attractive female friends I know that I would love a real romantic relationship with, ngl. But I'm not willing to jeopardize what we do have over it because they've actually been really, really good friends to me and helped me out of some emotional binds from past bad relationships. I think the guys who say that girls will only use a male friend as "an emotional tampon" never actually had any female friends growing up or anything. They are definitely reciprocal because they are FRIENDS. And friends need to have each other's backs like that. I'd say you're pretty accurate though. Like 75% of the time that's probably the case.
It's from When Harry Met Sally
Thanks for your input, honey
omg thats a film i've totally forgotten about. I've seen it a few times though.
Haha yeah, great movie
I totally relate to Harry, other than a few times when he's so arrogant it comes off sexist or something
i honestly can't remember the last time I saw a guy pull off a haircut like that LOL. wow
I don't find her attractive
I just strongly relate to his views
*him
yes you had me going like what? then who tf is Sally? The dude? lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pz1rjq5emKY
Lol shut up 😂
I'm sorry I had to add the Kung Pow scene this whole scenario just gave me a flashback from the past XD
I believe you're on Sally's side?
wutcha talk'n bout girl I'm backing Betty XD
but honestly its been SO long since I've seen that movie so I really dont remember it that well.
Do guys like girls like Sally?
I've always wondered.
I watched it like last month
when you ask about if guys like girls like sally are we talking looks, personality, what?
Personality
gosh i can't remember her personality. let me check her on YT real quick
Lols man. Okay come back
lol nah she's definitely not my type tbh lol
i just watched 2 videos. I don't know not my style. a bit too serious in her humor still.
I like her. She's soft edges and sometimes digs her own grave. PS. I'm bi
I like all roles Meg's ever played haha
lol its cool. so was my last girlfriend. I'm a hetero guy myself. X3
I know, hon.
you wanna grade my celeb crush? lol
Guys assume I'm lesbian so I clear it up every time
Sure tell
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E07wxTMvifc
the video is corny but she's so damn seductive. especially when she face reveals through the railings <3
Christina?
Cristina Scabbia <3 When I was in high school back from like 2004-2008 omg i was crushing so hard XD
She's a 9/10.
I'm more of a Kate Winslet girl
see i like the darker hair and eyes. Black and Brown hair are my favorite. Omggg raven haired goddesses <3
You're a simp for her aren't you
Usually you sound pretty darn serious but look at you now lol
actually tbh with you i'm not all as serious as people seem to think i am. I such at conveying my humor through text I'm sorry hhaha. Even when we had that other conversation i wasn't TRYING to be mean to anyone. Just convey my pov. If you got offended I'm sorry that wasn't my intention. Just expressing how my heart felt on that subject. I was trying that same thing and it destroyed my heart. Like it felt impaled on a spike and it just led me to question myself, my worth too much. But I can be serious and also playful. Am I simp for her? I mean once upon a time I was puddy for her. and if any woman had the ability to string me along it'd be her for sure. lol
*I suck at conveying
Of course. No hard feelings there.
Charlie Sheen, young of course. Rate him?
@anon1903 i'd like to message you and be able to share mytakes. But its your call. think you followed me before. We bump heads on some issues but doesn't mean we can't continue civil discourse.
no homo but he was a nice lookin fella back in Platoon!
He's yummy. And sure thing.
I have been friends with many women many very attractive women and I don't feel the need to have to have sex with women just because I find them attractive. Especially if I'm with somebody. Not all men are the same don't group us all together even if I do that myself by saying 90% of them are pigs LOL. You can be friends with a man and be best friends with a man and you don't have to have sex just to be best friends it may improve it or it may destroy it but it doesn't have to be
yeah thats true for the most part and there is nothing wrong with that.
You said it - because they're entitled...
For the same reason women think that they deserve a relationship. You meet a woman, go out a couple of times and next thing you know she's picking out curtains... And if you tell them that its off the table they get mad like wth?