Is it wrong to be selfish sexually and only do things that make you happy, or are you supposed to compromise?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • It depends on your partner. I have been with many selfish girls, because it turns me on a lot. Just like Pillow Princesses 😍
    If both partners care too much about the needs of the other, its can end in a "i like to do what you like" "and i like what you like". Thats so boring. I like a girl to tell me what she wants :)

    As for selfish, i had a girlfriend who made me lick her every day, while making me never cum. It was awesome!

    • Didn't you feel like she was a bad person 😂 I think I do this behaviour. I never thought about it untill now.

    • Noo it turned me on so much, every time she orgasmed without even caring about my orgasm, i fall more in love with her 😍

    • But that's bad?

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  • at times its ok to be selfish, but most times you should have some interest in your partners feelings and needs...
    and mostly, if both people were in to pleasing THEIR partner, without any selfishness, their sex life would be so much better...

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What Girls & Guys Said

7 40
  • It depends a lot on the sexual and relational dynamics. If there's a Dominant/submissive element present, then the submissive will find themselves complying most of the time.

  • Not so much a compromise as a mutual shared pleasure, sex shouldn't be about compromise.. With the right person, sexual chemistry it'll be about shared pleasure, shared wants/needs/sexual desires

  • Just do what makes you happy and F"UCK everybody else! Sounds like a great success plan to follow.

  • Definitely compromise. A girl needs what she needs! But people should also be eager to do anything possible to please their partners without going into things that are personally out of bounds. Sex is not one sided. Sometimes you have to take turns. And it's also great when each person uses their partner for their own pleasure simultaneously, like when he's riding you hard and you're riding him right back, saying things like "Yes! Just like that!" or "Fuck me harder!"

  • a healthy relationship, both in bed and out, requires agreement and compromise.

    Being selfish Sometimes, is normal.

  • In a relationship it’s wrong but it’s more about the overall longer term situation and not each act/aession. So one day could be more about you and more about them BUT it’s determined by whoever is really leading the relationship more than the other person. There’s always a leader.


    Casual sex is meaningless in that it doesn’t build/destroy a relationship between you & the other person. Not that I’m a fan of it tho... cause it uses your time & focus which could be put to better use.

  • It's OK, sometimes, to just be REALLY SELFISH, and just want your partner to just make EVERY EFFORT, and just totally adore you, and take care of you!!
    Some women have said, and during that time, and, OK, I know what she likes, and know the days, and some little, extra 'Love' and care, like she needs an 'excuse' to get that?
    When I am with one I think I love, every little thing, and just wanting to be close, and see her, and love her!!

  • So you never give your husband a blowjob, is that what you saying? :)

    • I do but I mostly receive

    • Okay, well it sounds pretty selfish, your husband is a submissive guy?

    • Not really

  • I think relationships are about sharing in all things. It's healthy to share your preferences allowing the partner to voice their opinion on what they are comfortable with and coming to a compromise. Relationships are healthier that way

  • to me sex is about the other person... if i want to be selfish then i will have a wank

  • It’s not wrong at all

  • Depends on the couple and how they see it I guess.

    I’d like to do the things we both like all the time.
    the things only one of us likes occasionally
    the things one likes and the other dislikes but can stand once in a blue moon.

    and that’s true for both my likes and hers. So my ideal partner has a similar view on things.

    • What do you guys both like can you give a example?

  • I guess it depends on what works for people and what they like. I my relationship i try my hardest to please my wife anyway she likes. But when it come to me she is like, mehhh. She thinks that all her efforts are is just being there. She put in the least amount of effort as possible. And heaven forbid if i say anything about it. Her excuse is that its take to much time and energy to get me off. She why not just fuck me till your done. Guess i really dont have to worrie about that to much anymore these days. We haven't had any sexual activitie in 2 years.

    • How can you live without sex for 2 years 😞

    • To tell you the truth, it is extreamly hard. I guess i can see it if i was singel but being married and sleeping inches away from a really beautiful wife and feeling like your miles apart. Really makes you questions your self and effects your everyday life. To take my mind of it i just try to stay busy and keep my self occupied with projects. But it only works so long.

    • Why she doesn't want? Did you ask her?

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  • Do things that doesn't make you unhappy.

  • Sex in a relationship, I've found, is better when giving and giving and giving... because then my wife (and old gfs) is very appreciative and wants to give something back.
    I love giving oral. I focus on that a lot.
    I can only have one orgasm and it's so intense that it leaves me weak and tired so I give her lots because after I cum I'm mostly done in. I'll usually go down on her to make her cum again and clean her up so there's no wet spot and we both sink right to sleep, dry and comfortable and exhausted.

  • It reeeeeally depends, Because some people use those terms is so broadly that they think they are being selfish by not wanting to be forced into sex.
    Very important to have standards and it's also very important to be loving to your partner. That middle ground is something that's relatively easy to know once you know the principles, but it is still on a case by case basis

  • I may be a little bit bias since I'm a cuck/sissy but heck yeah be selfish!

    • It's not rude? ☺️

    • I mean context matters but usually not. In my case as a cuckold I encourage my partners to seek pleasure without worrying about mine.

    • Lol in fact in my case my own partners can have OTHER sexual partners.

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  • For me I feel great satisfying my boyfriend it’s pretty easy to too lol like it excites me when I make him feel good. I think efforts should be both 50/50

  • If you are in a relationship and you are not able to reciprocate or feel miserable if you do, guess what. Why are you in the relationship in the first place?

  • Well, generally speaking, sex is supposed to be done in a way that satisfies both partners.

    But I don't think it's wrong to have one night once in a while that is just about you. But it should really be their idea, not yours. I think it would be more meaningful if it was a gift from them from their heart.

    • ☺️☺️

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